It’s Father’s Day. Those of you who know me know that I lost my first dad to suicide in August of 1992. I used his death as an excuse to begin my cycle of despair and I continued to use it as an excuse to stay stuck. Satan lied to me the day he died. Not just baby white lies. BIG, FAT, NASTY lies that I believed. I believed that I would be just like him. I believed that no one loved me. I believed that it was my fault. I believed that God was not real. I believed…
I didn’t understand why my mom got remarried so soon. I didn’t really understand how she could get over my dad so quickly. I didn’t understand our blended family and I didn’t really want to. I wanted to graduate from high school and get out. That was always my goal….to run as far away as possible. But the one thing I learned at Jacob’s Well that changed my life forever was “it’s not all about me.” Once the Lord spoke into my spirit and told me that it was never about me and that it was quite frankly none of my business, the chains hit the floor. The chains that had me in bondage for over 20 years came crashing down with a clang and I was FREE.
Ephesians 6:4 – Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.
I was exasperated, that is truth, but let me tell you about my dad today. His name is Mike and he is amazing! He loves my mom more than any man ever could and he loves the Lord with all his heart. He came in and swept us all away with his charm and his grace. When my mom had her car accident, it was he that gave her baths, shaved her legs, got her dressed, and fed her when she could do none of it without assistance. It was this man that never left her side when she didn’t even know who he was because of her brain injury. Where was I? Running away again. This man picked up the pieces of my mistakes after I had thrown everything on the ground and helped me put my life back together…over, and over, and over again. This man flew to North Dakota after my divorce only to drive me and my car back to Virginia. This man was the one standing there when I was released from a hospital in Virginia after a near fatal suicide attempt of my own. He had once again flown to where I was, only to drive me back home to Louisiana. This man is the one who got me out of every debt, paved the way for me to take care of my business, and helped me see light where there was no light. This man wiped my tears, picked me up off the ground, and dusted me off, time and again.
1 Timothy 5:8 – Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their own household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever.
Where would I be if he hadn’t come into our lives? He didn’t just marry my mom, he became my dad. My mom is so happy today. Her life is full of joy and she loves him like I have never seen her love another. Her heart is complete and her tears from 22 years ago long gone. It’s not about me. My first dad had to leave so we all could be complete again. So we could know joy again. So we could have peace again. So SHE could be happy again. I miss my first dad very much but I don’t dwell on his death any longer. I am SO GRATEFUL that God saw fit for my mom to grow old with such an amazing example of husband, father, and friend.
Psalm 110:1-5 – Praise the Lord! Blessed is the man who fears the Lord, who greatly delights in his commandments! His offspring will be mighty in the land; the generation of the upright will be blessed. Wealth and riches are in his house, and his righteousness endures forever. Light dawns in the darkness for the upright; he is gracious, merciful, and righteous. It is well with the man who deals generously and lends; who conducts his affairs with justice.
This life we all cherish today as a family is because of the godly man at the center of it all!!! Thank you, dad, for being such an amazing person. Thank you for following the Lord. Thank you for being such an awesome husband to my mom. Thank you for being Papaw to my children. Thank you for picking up the pieces of our brokenness. Thank you for being there for all of us. THANK YOU. I LOVE YOU! My Heavenly Father saw fit that you enter our lives and change it all for the good! We are blessed because of YOU.